For years, April prayed and waited for another baby to come into their little family. Early this year, she had a hunch that her prayer was finally answered but kept brushing off the thought.
‘I was somehow in denial although I was feeling dizzy every morning,’ she said.
One morning, she finally grabbed a test kit. And the test kit read – positive!
“It gave me a sense of relief and clarity because the news came at a time when I’m contemplating on what to do next with my career and it’s a crystal clear answer where I should focus next,” April said.
Four weeks after, here comes the coronavirus raining down on her parade. Her husband, as if some bad joke also tested positive…but of the disease.
“The relief quickly turned into fear and anxiety, and everything else became blurred. It was just overwhelming.
I know my husband is a strong person inside out but… how will this hit him? How long will we have to endure this? What else can be done to get him out of that situation? What if my 5 year-old kid and I have contacted the disease? Are we going to be isolated? If we got it, who will take care of Liam in the hospital? What will happen to the baby? Should we continue Tobi’s treatment at home or admit him to a hospital? Is the hospital a safer and better place? Should we just stay at home to be sure we won’t spread the disease? Or should Liam and I move out of the house to save ourselves and leave Tobi alone? Where will we go?”
With these overwhelming questions and thoughts swirling in her head, she had no choice but to live one baby step at a time.
“Every day, I open the door of our isolation room to get the food tray and feed myself and my son. I take my meds, give Liam a bath, keep him inside the room, answer his questions. I report our status to the local health office, talk to Tobi, talk to the baby inside me, sleep, wake up. It gets mundane by the day but these small steps led me one day to another. There were many times I felt I did not handle the situation at all like I could have used my time to create or learn something new, but when we finally got our clearance to go out of the room, I felt a sense of achievement.”
April and Liam would lull themselves to sleep at night with topics which ranges from nightmares, not giving up and quarantine thoughts. From these heart-to-hearts, a podcast was born.
“It made my husband and Liam happy; it gave us something else to look forward to.
This whole experience made me appreciate most the beauty of needing. Asking for help is a brave thing to do. One thing I learned to accept was that you cannot force healing halfway through the pain. You can’t always help yourself. You really have to open your door so that people can step in or at least leave something there–a food tray, a prayer, a message, and you’ll be surprised there’s a lot more they can offer. Other people’s love will heal you. The world often demands us to be strong and independent but times like this will make us realize how much we need each other, how important is “one another.”